Sense of Self

If you were to just ask me what “sense of self” means, I’d laugh in your face and then have an existential crisis while simultaneously stuffing my face with chocolate. So I’m not going to answer that. But I am going to play off of YouTuber Ingrid Nilsen’s ‘Sense of Self’ series; the basic rundown is she visits the home of her featured guest and said guest shares five objects that represent each of the five senses to them. Ok, readysetgo.

I’m just now coming back to this one after finishing the rest. Future me says hi! I’m cheating and putting down three: anywhere in Paris, the 2005 version of ‘Pride and Prejudice,’ and the inside of la Sagrada Familia. I’m warning you, don’t make me choose just one.

1)   Paris because I’m a cliché. But in all honesty I think the City of Lights lives up to its hyper-romanticization. Also, bread. Lots of amazing bread.
2)   I’ve lost count on how many times I’ve watched this movie and I refuse to watch any other version because Keira Knightley is forever Elizabeth and Matthew Macfadyen is forever Darcy—no ‘ifs’ or ‘buts’ about it. #whereismydarcytho
3)   See pictures below.

The initial answer is easy; it has to be a song. If I’m on my laptop (which is always) I’m listening to music and if I’m walking anywhere outside I have my earbuds in, without fail. Thank you, Spotify Premium, for not letting ads ruin my happiness (#notsponsored).  

By now most of my friends involuntarily know I’ve been batshit crazy about... completely obsessed with... listening to KPop music as of lately, but I’m going to choose both a Korean and English song (painful to choose just one for each, asdflkjsffff).

~Korean song~
'Blue' by Big Bang
This song literally soothes my nerves; I can’t even describe it. It has a super melancholy undertone but it makes me so happy. Not going to analyze what that means.

~English song~
'One Call Away' by Charlie Puth
What else to say besides I'm in love with this guy's velvety voice. *heart-eyed emoji*

My bed? Blankets smothering me when it’s winter and I’m back home and every upstairs room feels like being trapped inside a tundra? Strong contenders for the true potato that I am. It may not have much meaning behind it, but I’d say currently it’d be a skincare product that you spray on your face: MISSHA’s Time Revolution The First Treatment Essence Mist. Try saying that three times fast. It’s cooling, calming, and generously treats my skin; love it.

HANDS DOWN the smell of my Mom’s ‘tian su bing,’ or 甜酥饼 (shout out to Claire for proving I haven’t retained much from 8 years of Chinese school), baking in the oven. Tian su bing are only the most heavenly, perfectly sweet and flaky Chinese pastries to ever exist—but let’s be clear, only those made by my mom qualify. I devour these so quickly that my mom has actually tried to stop me from eating too many in one day. Like that’d ever work.

*Note to self: Learn how to make them, or have Mom mail a bunch over every two months. The latter seems more likely.
**Honorary shout out to our current bathroom soap. Sugar cane husk, mmm.

See above. In addition, mashed potatoes and chocolate chip cookies will never let you down.

That's it. That's all.